My First Half IM. + Everything in Desaru Race :)

This entry documents my TRUE personal feelings in the trip to Desaru. Its way too long to be read as entertainment but I need to write them down because its one of the biggest happening in my life. The sprint category stuffs are also generally noted as I ran through stations to stations to support them.

Race: Desaru Half IM
Timing: 6hrs 10mins
Crashes: 1
Bodily bruises: 8+
Ego hurt: none.
Lessons learnt: Many.
Favorite part of the race: Feeling the Love from Team Sapphire. :)

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Woke up at 7 with a queasy stomach.. fell back to sleep and decided to skip breakfast. I was hoping that it is just pre race nerves and i could just to sleep it off.. but it did not go away, I still diarhea at the last toilet break before race starts. I knew I had gastro problem and almost a gastro-flu before I made my trip to Desaru.. I was trying very hard to rest it off and eating medicine( 3 days before I was asking around for quick fix - thanks to Yikang, Banyang, Buddy Peilin and also Samsam).. and I was thinking "com'on.. not today..".. nonetheless, i switched my plan to just caloric drinks and no solid food.. The Race Must Go On. I will not let what happened to Aviva this year to happen to me again even if I DNF in the race, I'm gonna start it.

So, very quickly, I set up the transition area with the help of samsam and guess what? MR GU is right beside me! The thoughts of friends around (Lawrence, 42 yr old is doing his First Half IM with me too, and he picked up swimming seriously just last november.. YOU, YOU AND YOU.. DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE TOO OLD ANYMORE TO START EXERCISING.) calms me down a little bit, but just for a while.

I stepped onto the beach and my mind was split between visualizing the race plan and thoughts like following, switching every 2 seconds interval.

- Swim easy at start
- Shit the buoy look so FAR AWAY!
- Build into swim
- Gawd look at the 470 participants!
- Just focused on long strokes and ignore the washing machine
- 2KM of swim, 2 X WASHING MACHINE?! WTF?!

Ok, so that went on for a while.. went to warm up and the sun starting beating down.. its 10AM.. Then I started worrying about drinking too much salt water and getting dehydrated with a cramp.. I got a cramp at OSIM's second lap of swim.. and that didn't feel good. So I came up with a plan to build my kick up to the shore on the first lap to get some blood to the legs when I run across the shore to the second lap.

Just as I got the plan and felt confident, I saw lawrence.. which calms me down even more.. But..Without much warning, uncle chan (race organizer cum MC cum EVERYTHING) spouted a quick "THREE TWO ONE GO!" + *LONG Start Horning sound*.. RACE STARTS! gosh.. it just doesn't let my nerves rest a little bit more eh.

I've done 3km swims many times, I know I'm gonna do sub 40 if I go strong at it no matter the waves, its just a matter of 1 or 3 minutes below 40.. So my plan was to build into the swim and just finish strongly. However, as I continued swimming, I noticed some sort of panic setting in. I think it was too long since my last group swim in open water.. but that was easy to brush aside after all the training i've gone through to back me up. And then I noticed that if I push real hard here, I may be heading to a DNF quicker than I thought since I only had about 600Calories of liquid breakfast without a gel at the start due to the stupid queasy stomach... change of plan, I went at aout 70% of what I had in my tank for the entire swim.. saving much for the run later (u have to think far. its a 6 hrs affair).

Coming out of the first lap, the build of kicks worked and I didn't get a cramp. I'm happy about it but the choppy water just keep eating us up when we swim out.. having 400 participants swimming together really really doesn't help at all. Nonetheless, finished the swim very relaxed and easy almost like an overly long warmup. 43minutes was the time.. hack, I didn't even start my watch.. samsam told me the timing.

Vince and Samsam cheered me on the exit like i'm a superstar.. so thankful for that.jogged to the transition area.. Got to my bike, everything went smoothly as I've ran through them 10times at home and 100 times in my head.

This bike course is so hilly that even in the hotel, once you turn out of the Transition, you get 1 upslope.

Go easy on the first 10 minutes, build it up.. I've done this many times.. no problemO. First round went real good. Easy does it at 58minutes. Passing by TEAM SAPPHIRE PIT STOP was REALLY motivating.. Saw the cardboard and all the kids and vincent videoing and smiling and cheering.. That's the ultimate joy of doing this whole thing to me.

Anyway, I knew that I have more than enough to finish a sub 3 bike leg given that the first lap was done at like 75% of my bike ability for long rides.. The peaking went really well.. confidence starts building up.. the hills looks so small now and I'm always looking forward to conquering the next one and seeing the ego eats most of the riders up as they refuse to change to a smaller chain ring/cog at the rear to spin up.. I enjoy very much the scene of those 120mm wheels zoom right pass me and get stuck at a grindy stop in the middle of the hills and I just happily spun at 85cad pass them at an effort I could still smirk and talk crap to myself even at the steepest of them all hills.

Everything was really cool, and I saw MR GU was kind of giving me a run for my money since he is just about -5minutes behind me (despite coming up slower in the swim?) thus I picked up speed a little.. I did not let competitiveness take over me at this point though.. my plan was to race smart, if emotions were to take over, it has to be the last 4km of the entire race.

And right at 40km mark, where there is this U turn.. Once I finish the u turn, I saw this plumb fair chinese guy in front of me standing up to pump and thus I looked down for a couple of seconds as I stand up to pump cervie to speed too and guess what? I saw my front wheel 30cm away from that guy's downtube and he was static!

Jam braked, cervie did a cartwheel, I did a bad fall. I saw my water bottles flew over the other side of the road, my mind went stunned..

Then that guy went "EH.. sorry.. cramp ar.. sorry.. eH.. I go first ok. bye." and he rode off..

I briefly acknowledged.. as my mind went swirling for a bit.. is this how its gonna end? NO WAY! My wheels. My frameset. My body.. Did a body and health check, lots of blood on left elbow and palm.. deep deep cuts. Grazes on both knees under my tights and cuts on my right palm and a sprained right palm..

I can bear with that for 50km more ride and 21km run.. no problem... The pressing on the handle bars and aerobars would act as direct pressure on the wounds to stop bleeding I think (I was a little wrong on this later as I found out the blood soaked through. :P)..

The bike wheels a little untrue and calipers went off aligned.. One bottle cage broken so I had to abandon my almost empty bottle.

Then MR GU passed me. Great.

The first aid ladies were kind enough to pick up my bottles for me and I was lucky that I had a bottle of electrolytes left. So after fiddling with the bike, I got it ready to roll again in about 10 minutes. The ladies casually (it actually is ANYHOW. really.) wrapped up my wounds and I rode on with blood and iodine filled gauze and tapes on my left arm.

NOW I LOOK TRULY LIKE AN IRON MAN GOING TO WAR.

Firstly, i'm gonna catch that bastard.. secondly, I'm gonna catch MR GU.

I rode HARD. I let go of all my worries and ride at the best of my ability (still within plan) to make up for lost time.. I caught up with that guy in 2 hills as he stopped for stretching again and I caught up with MR GU at the beginning of my last lap of bike when we both stopped and refill. He went off first but I caught up shortly and overtook him for good.

When i pass Team Sapphire pit stop I gave them a firm thumbs up to ease any worries seeing my wrapped arm and palm.

About 8km into the third lap, I noticed its time to eat the last gel. Shockingly, I couldn't find them in my rear pockets! Morale dropped really low.. I must have lost them at the crash site when I flew over the bike. :(

I've trained riding and running with empty stomachs a few times before and I'm pretty sure I can complete the last lap at a zone 2 effort but that'll be really slow.

Barely made it back within 3hrs of riding feeling very low on glucose and nearly bonking. T2 was smooth too and I quickly downed a gel and started my run..

Ran up the hill and pass Team sapphire pit stop again.. superstardom treatment at its best.. bro handed me drink.. sam poured water on me.. i passed my hr monitor belt to them to keep as i forgot to remove. Off i go again..

12x8 minutes run alternating easy and hard was the plan.

However, 5km into the run, i realized that the damage was already done at the bike leg due to lack of fuel. Bonked out.. reduced to walk-a-run with the small bananas and 2 gels I had with me.. The problem with me is that once I hit bonking, I can't get it back and my body won't quite seem to react to whatever more i'm eating after that. Happened in training rides and runs..

The heat was UNFORGIVING...

Thoughts of giving up was creeping in quickly.

I switch to desperate resort.. playing mind and number games..

"com'on.. walk 5 minutes, run 5 minutes. u can do it. you've done two half marathons before coming here!"..

I only managed 5 minutes walk + 3 minutes run.. a few times.. and then I brisk/power walked.. stopped at every station to cool down and drink.

Passing by the team sapphire pit stop was like a place where I wanna raise my white flag.. but I shrug it off immediately and tell myself, "you've done 5 hours of racing and its just walk-a-run for 1 more hr and u wanna give it up?! they've been in the heat supporting you for 5 freaking hot hours and you raise the flag?!"

I plowed on.. I dug deeper into myself and I managed a 3km run (golden beach resort).. then reduced to walk again.. I talked to people who are walking.. I tried to follow ppl's jogging pace but I kept going faster.. the heat has taken a toll on my mind and body that I can no longer deduce pace of my run versus distance..

I tried eating more and drinking more... doesn't help..

BUT I WANT IT.

I WANT IT SO BAD.

I dragged myself up the slope and saw the shelter outside the hotel, that's another 2 to 3 km more!

"OH MY GAWD ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!"

I smiled and picked up my tired legs that suddenly seems lighter.. I jogged pass team sapphire pit stop and my bro jogged along with me..

"REMEMBER ALL THE TRAINING YOU'VE DONE?! WHAT IS THIS? YOU CAN DO IT!"

"Yes.. yes I can.. but I almost can't walk anymore... YES I CAN.. YES!"

The short convo shot me sky high in morale only to bring me down with the super steep hill on the left turn.. Walked up tht hill and I finally found my legs to run my only race pace stretch back to hotel.

Turning into the hotel was SADISTIC as they place one more hill at the last 200m... :(

Jogged up that hill and gladly ran down the last stretch... People were clapping.. Vincent was videoing.. Christine and Sam and my bro was cheering.. Wilson was cheering.. Mari was upstairs.. :P.. AND I SPRINT PASS THAT FINISHING LINE PUMPING MY FISTS INTO THE AIR VICTORIOUS OF MYSELF.

I know I am now stronger. By the help of my friends and team mates and my brother and my love ones. Also by the way I dug so deep.. I've never wanted something SO BADLY since so long already.

I almost teared.

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However, I know the race is not over yet.. I gave some speech to videoman vincent and his camera and made my way back to my bike.. sam helped me up and down.. carrying some loads for me.. then when I met up with the rest Christine and JoJo congratulated me... I gave the most sincere acknowledgement with the shagged smile I could put up.. then I quickly walked and jogged to find lawrence..


I said I won't leave him behind. I won't.


My left arm and palm was trembling.. the cuts were deep and adrenaline has worn off from the race.. my vision was blurry and my heart has never slowed from the 6 hrs of torture. My knees are giving and my quads are in semi cramp state. But my mind was determined on being there for lawrence in his grueling trial of his first Half IM.

I limped and jogged together with Lexus to the downslope.. we waited for a while because I was afraid I can't get back up if I went down.. but still, after some waiting, I went down and up the slope out of the hotel. I asked Lexus to wait for me outside the hotel exit and I will fetch his daddy back. So onwards I marched and I saw lawrence coming back~! I tried to give chase towards the steep left turn but I just couldn't pick up enough speed. I dash across the road however to give him one final shout out to let him know he's not alone and then dashed back to the hotel side and walk upwards to meet him and get ready for another 400m jog back with him..

Inwards he comes and with leadership aura glowing around him, he was leading a pack of 4 to finish together. When we meet up, we made the move and advanced forward.. Accompanied him til the last 50meter and shouted and rooted for him til he crossed the finishing line.

Honestly, I had never felt such strong sense of achievement(helping somebody with his first Half IM dream) and inspirations(seeing someone who's never a super athlete ever before in his life achieve such a goal in such a short time) ever.. Tears flowed in my throat as I limped towards him at the finishing line and gave him the most barbaric hug two men can give to each other. What a day.

Still, the race is not over until my brother stands up to the trial of his first mass sea swim and first triathlon and of course my trusty supporters cum team mate finish their race gracefully. I held back my relief and raced back to get rested so I can give them as much tips and info on the race route as possible.

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So on that night, I gave some sort of map-hack briefing to them.. prepared them to visualize the course and the number of hills and what gears to use.. last minute prep of transition stuffs and also bike maintenance. Then watched some tortoise mating with the mouth wide open.. And then we go to slp..I however, spent the night sleepless due to fatigue and also some worries for my brother. Afterall, he is my only brother and the next most important person in my life other than sam.

The morning came really soon. It was raining! Gosh, brother is really "suay" man.. but I kept holding back my worries for him and I know I need to appear confident.. because if the coach is shaky, you can't expect your athlete to feel otherwise. I also kept telling myself that I have to let go and let him learn.. its for the better.. just like a trial for him being officially water safe and race ready from now on.

Off they go at 8.30am as the rain pelts down. In 12 minutes, Wilson, Sam and Mari came back.. my worries grew more than a little bit of panic as I saw the few people who are swimming in totally opposite directions and some are threading water waiting to be towed back.. I was straining my eyes to recognize his strokes.. I couldn't..

16 Minutes in and I was almost giving up.. I search around the beach with my eyes eagerly for him to walk to me and said he couldn't make up.. but when I look back to the exit, THERE HE IS.. HE RAN OUT STRONGLY.. AS PRO LOOKING AS EVER.

I gave him that thumbs up and mega watt smile and went to pick up the 5 kgs worth of orange bag of H-TWO-O and water.. ran to transition area.. ran to the exit and found Nuno.. I ran up and down with the 6 mega big towels in my arms and my wounds of my palm splitting up.. sorry for bleeding on the towel through the triangle bandage.

Took photos of them.. cheered for them.. my knees were so painful and my muscles cramping.. so fatigued.. I did all I could to muster that strength to cheer for them as they pass by and I chat with my new portugese friend to keep myself widely awake.

I clapped through my soaked bandaged as hard as I could as they bike and ran pass me. My brother look so pro I didn't recognize him when he ran pass me. LOL.

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When all is said and done.. I was so very relieved and happy for them.. I had never felt so proud before in my life than at the moment we took that Team Sapphire group photo.. Right there, are all my team mates.. one of them being my real brother just made the moment sweeter than ever. I could merely smile and laugh together with them because I was just so .. so.. fatigued.. I could sense it overwhelming in my half-pass-six smiles and laughter as they chat.. For once in two tough days.. I gave up and suggested to return to room first to rest up a little.. And guess what.. I forgot the key...

oh well....


Thank God for keeping all of us safe and all the blessing and fun that we all had. Thank God for Chang Jie and Teck Beng's Personal Best, Thank God for YY's completion of first OD Tri.
Thank God for all the 5 kids who I've trained to complete their first Triathlon. Thank God for keeping them safe too.
Thank God for every love we've all felt in the race and all the things we've learnt.. That one cannot stand strong alone by himself, no IronMan can do it without the crowd and no Half IM for me if not for Team Sapphire. There was a lot of first in this trip.. and all are so lovely. :)
Amen to that. :)

Cheers
KK

NOTES:

YY's first Tri/OD Tri
KH's first Tri/Sprint Tri
Lawrence and KK's first H-IM
Sam, Wilson, Mari, KH, KK, Lawrence's first oversea race
Vincent's first oversea driving trip with family
Chloe, Vincent Wong, Hong Jun, Saori and Jasmine's First triathlon!